Cool (and Downright Weird) Celebrity Birth Stories

Sure, you’ve perused pics of Blue Ivy, Suri Cruise and the Beckham brood — but have you heard famous celeb parents tell their birth stories?

Cool (and Downright Weird) Celebrity Birth Stories

lively — Actor Ryan Reynolds poses with his wife, actress Blake Lively, their daughter James, left, and their youngest daughter during a ceremony to award him a star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame on Dec. 15, 2016, in Los Angeles.

For most of us, giving birth involves a plain ol’ hospital bed — not an entire maternity wing. There’s usually a whole lot of red-faced screaming and sweat-soaked cries for help — not serene (read: kinda creepy) silence.

And for the love of baby, most newbie parents aren’t listening to their own songs playing over the loudspeakers while they push. But celebrities are another breed entirely, of course, and their birth stories prove it. From eating your own placenta to pulling your own baby out of your uterus, these are the weirdest, wildest and most Hollywood births we’ve ever heard.

Camila Alves and Matthew McConaughey

There’s nothing more Matthew McConaughey-errific than this birth story. According to the actor, during the birth of his first child with Camila Alves in 2008, he got “right between her legs” and started “DJing this Brazilian music.” He added, “We got tribal on it; we danced to it!”

Truly, we wouldn’t have expected anything less from the man who was once famously spotted playing the bongo drums and dancing in the nude at his home in Texas.

Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt

Naturally for the couple who used to spend their time flying planes, saving the world and raising their multicultural children in far-flung locales across the globe (R.I.P. Brangelina), a simple birth at Cedars-Sinai in Los Angeles wouldn’t do for their biological kids.

Jolie gave birth to Shiloh in 2006 in Namibia, and the twins, Knox and Vivienne, were born in 2008 in Nice, France. Of Shiloh’s birth, Jolie told Vanity Fair, “I had a C-section, and I found it fascinating. I didn’t find it a sacrifice, and I didn’t find it a painful experience. I found it a fascinating miracle of what a body can do.”

Stars! They’re nothing like us.

Kelly Preston and John Travolta

Famed Scientologist couple John Travolta and Kelly Preston implemented a pretty hardcore delivery room rule when their son Benjamin was born in 2011. As is common practice in Scientology, everyone in the room was forbidden to talk during the labor.

Preston later told the “Today” show, “L. Ron Hubbard [the founder of Scientology] found that the single source of aberration, of psychosomatic illnesses, stress, fears, worry, things like that, have to do with the reactive mind, and in that part of the mind are different words and commands that can come back to affect you later in your life.”

OK...

Amy Poehler and Will Arnett

It sounds more like a “Saturday Night Live” skit than real life, but crazily enough, Amy Poehler’s OB-GYN died the day before she gave birth to her and Will Arnett’s first son, Archie, in 2008. In fact, Poehler was on the set of “SNL” the day before her due date, rehearsing scenes with Jon Hamm, when she found out about her doctor’s passing.

She recounted what happened for a panel at BookCon in 2014: “So, it’s my first kid, I’m in a ‘Mad Men’ outfit, I turn to everybody, and I hysterically start crying, and a really pregnant woman crying is terrifying. And Jon Hamm, who I am just getting to know, comes over and puts his hands on my shoulder and is like, ‘This is a really important show for me. I’m gonna need you to get your shit together.’ And I laughed so hard, I probably peed myself.”

Miranda Kerr and Orlando Bloom

During the birth of their son, Flynn, in 2011, Miranda Kerr reportedly forbade Orlando Bloom from using the bathroom — as a result, he had to pee in a bottle while Kerr was in labor.

Of the birth itself, Kerr told Sunday Magazine, “I actually thought I was going to die at one point and left my body. I was looking down on myself; the pain was so intense.”

Mariah Carey and Nick Cannon

When Mariah Carey and Nick Cannon welcomed twins Monroe and Moroccan in 2011, it sounds like it was a befittingly diva-like experience: Carey requested that her own music be playing in the delivery room during the birth. And that’s not all.

According to Cannon, “Now, my wife wanted to make sure that, when the babies came out, they came out not only to a Mariah Carey song, but a live performance from Mariah Carey — her Madison Square performance of ‘Fantasy’ — so they came out to a round of applause.”

Alicia Silverstone and Christopher Jarecki

It probably shouldn’t come as a surprise that the actress who famously pre-chewed her baby Bear Blu’s food on camera and wrote a parenting book that advised, among many other things, against using tampons and vaccinating your children also has an interesting story about her birth experience in 2011. In an interview with “Live! With Kelly & Michael,” the actress said, “The first 14 hours was almost sexy. The [natural hormone] oxytocin was doing all this magic, and it felt amazing.”

She then told the audience, “Someone gifted me my placenta in the form of a pill. They encapsulate it. And I have to tell you that I really loved it.”

Yum?

Alexi Ashe and Seth Meyers

Last year on an episode of “Late Night,” Seth Meyers revealed that he and wife Alexi Ashe had welcomed their second son — in the lobby of their New York apartment building. Apparently, Ashe progressed so rapidly in her labor that she wasn’t even able to make it to the car.

Meyers said, laughing, “I looked at my wife, and the only way I can describe how my wife looked was she looked like someone who was hiding a baby in a pair of sweatpants. It was like somebody was trying to sneak a baby on a plane.”

Kourtney Kardashian and Scott Disick

In true Kardashian fashion, Kourtney Kardashian opted to film her first two (of three) births in 2009 and 2012, as part of the hit show “Keeping Up with the Kardashians” — perhaps you’ve heard of it? And millions of viewers everywhere were treated to some seriously graphic footage.

In both of these episodes, Kourtney can be seen physically pulling her children out during labor and placing them on her chest. Talk about intense! And pretty darn awesome.

Gisele Bundchen and Tom Brady

Much to the chagrin of everyone who’s ever given birth, Gisele Bundchen claimed that labor didn’t hurt “in the slightest.” Bundchen gave birth to her and Tom Brady’s son, Benjamin, in 2009 at home in the couple’s Boston condo. Brady later revealed that the whole process — labor, delivery and all — took just eight hours.

In her new book, “Lessons: My Path to a Meaningful Life,” Bundchen admitted that she went against her doctor’s orders when she insisted on a home birth. “The doctor told me that it was too dangerous for me to have a home birth,” she writes. “He said that Benny was in an unusual position, my hips were too small, and the odds just weren’t in my favor.”

If we needed further proof that Gisele is some kind of futuristic alien robot from Planet Supermodel, this is surely it.

Kate Hudson and Danny Fujikawa

In October 2018, Kate Hudson welcomed her third baby, Rani Rose Hudson Fujikawa, into the world (her first with boyfriend Danny Fujikawa). She and her mother, Goldie Hawn, recently went on “Ellen” to discuss the experience, which sounds like a Hollywood rom-com come to life.

According to Hawn, the doctor told her to step back or else she’d “fall in”, and Hudson went on to say of her mom, “She wanted me to think of my vagina as a magnolia flower. I was like, ‘I never want to think of my vagina that big — ever.”

Blake Lively and Ryan Reynolds

It’s no secret that Ryan Reynolds and Blake Lively love getting cutesy on each other’s social media. But last year, Reynolds took it to the next level. Imploring his wife to let him in on the plot twist behind her 2018 film, “A Simple Favor,” he tweeted, “You can tell me. We’re married. You once drove me to the hospital when you were giving birth. So … what the f— happened to Emily?”

An adorable tweet to be sure, but we’re mostly just impressed that Lively actually drove to the hospital while in labor. Unfortunately, the couple wouldn't reveal whether it was during the birth of their daughter James in 2014 or their daughter Inez in 2016.