16 Ideas for Planning the Perfect Micro Wedding
No aspect of our lives has been untouched by the pandemic — and that includes our romantic relationships. According to the Brides 2020 American Wedding Study, 66 percent of couples made the decision to postpone their 2020 wedding. And 81 percent of respondents said the pandemic has changed their expectations for their wedding day.
Those who’ve decided to go ahead with their nuptials typically opted for what’s been dubbed a micro wedding. This includes all the same traditions as larger weddings but on a much smaller scale. While there are no hard-and-fast rules, micro weddings usually have no more than 50 guests.
Of course, smaller weddings have always been around — not everybody has the budget or the desire for a 500-strong guest list. But thanks to our new reality, the micro wedding has become a trend that won’t necessarily go out of style any time soon. Here are some tips and tricks on how to do just that.
Set Your Budget Before Anything Else
Even the smallest, simplest of weddings cost money.
“I start planning a micro wedding the same way I would start planning a regular wedding — by establishing a budget,” says Charlotte, North Carolina–based wedding planner Emore Campbell.
The Bottom Line
For some people, downsizing on the guestlist means downsizing on the spend, while others blow the budget.
“It's the perfect way to get almost every single thing you imagined for your wedding because your guest count is lower,” Campbell says. “That means one-to-five incredibly adorned tables versus 25 mediocre tables.”
Consider Your Guest List Carefully
The one big difference between a micro wedding and a regular wedding is the headcount. This can cause issues because you might not be able to invite everyone you want to be there.
You may not be able to include your entire extended family or large friend group like you originally planned, warns Brittney Bartling, a New York wedding planner who works with couples on personalized micro wedding packages.
The Bottom Line
Lynne Kennedy of bespoke wedding and event planners, The Gilded Aisle, recommends establishing some ground rules for the guest list so that there are no hurt feelings and no family feels snubbed.
That means you’ll want to give both families the same number of extra guests and make the call about children fairly.
You Might Have More Venue Options
With a micro wedding, it’s unlikely you’ll be turned away for having too many people.
“You can consider everything from a backyard to a traditional wedding venue,” says Samie Roberts, co-founder of Bustld.
The Bottom Line
This is your chance to think outside the box when it comes to venues, says Elizabeth Babinski, the founder of Liz Rae Weddings and Vows Well Traveled. If you’ve always dreamed of getting married on a tiny beach, in a meadow or at your favorite restaurant, the time is now.
Washington, D.C., event planner Vicky Choy of Event Accomplished, warns of choosing a space that’s too large for your group or else it will feel very empty.
But Your Venue Might Be Non-Negotiable on Price
Micro weddings can appear cheaper at first glance; however, some costs stay fixed no matter how many guests you invite, says Campbell. For instance, venues may charge by the hour, not by the guest.
“Not all wedding venues provide cheaper micro weddings packages,” adds Bartling.
The Bottom Line
If your dream venue won’t budge on price, your photographer might be able to help.
“Many photographers that specialize in micro weddings and elopements offer assistance with finding a location,” says Kim Hefner of Wild and Found Photography. “This is actually one of the benefits to working with a photographer that specializes in smaller ceremonies, as opposed to more traditional wedding photographers.”
Your Reception Might Not Be the Main Focus
While the reception may have been the main focus in pre-pandemic times, there tends to be a lot more focus on the ceremony in micro weddings.
“The upside of a micro wedding is that all the traditions of a larger wedding fly out the window, so you can truly plan your day around whatever it is you'd like to do,” says Babinski.
The Bottom Line
You might want to go for a hike after the ceremony, then have a shorter reception or a small ceremony with a champagne toast.
Of course, you can still have the full wedding experience of dinner and dancing, albeit with a more intimate guest count than a traditional wedding, says Alexis Alvarez of The Chicago Mini Wedding Collective.
Concentrate on the Details
Emilie Dulles, etiquette and event expert, points out that less can still be “more” with a micro wedding — if you pay attention to detail. This might mean going for custom patterned, hand-lined envelopes with stunning calligraphy for your save the dates or dinner menus with an engraved monogram.
In fact, stationery is one area where you can really benefit from a reduced guest list.
The Bottom Line
“Instead of having to consider the normally exorbitant cost of save-the-dates, invitations and seated dinner calligraphy — multiplied by hundreds of invitees and eventual guests — micro weddings and receptions for as few as 10 to 35 guests (and as many as 50 in certain cities or states) allow for more sumptuous wedding invitations and stationery throughout your entire event,” Dulles explains.
Enjoy the Intimacy
The plus side of a small guest list is an instant warm, cozy feel.
“Micro weddings allow for a super intimate experience for the couple and the guests,” says Bartling. “By having a smaller guest count, it allows the couple to be fully present and enjoy the moments throughout the day with their closest loved ones.”
The Bottom Line
Plus, with a more intimate gathering, you can really let your imagination go wild. “It allows creative or logistical elements that may not have fit in with a larger event to take place,” says Abby Frye, in-house event planner of Patrick Properties Hospitality Group's four wedding venues in Charleston, South Carolina.
For instance, you could host a mid-week celebration at a highly sought-after venue or add in a custom bourbon bar with your favorite spirits. You can also ditch the traditions you don’t want, like having bridesmaids, groomsmen or speeches at your reception — this is your chance to do it your way.
Don’t Skimp on Photography
Just because your wedding is smaller, it doesn't mean that the photography is less important.
“No matter how you celebrate your nuptials, your feelings and emotions are going to be powerful, genuine and meaningful,” says Anji Martin, co-owner at Potok's World Photography. “You are still going to want to remember, relive and re-experience them in 30 years.”
The Bottom Line
As Martin points out, your photos are going to be one of the only permanent reminders of your wedding day. The best ones will take you on that emotional journey through it; subpar ones will just show you what happened and nothing more. “So make sure to hire a photographer who can give you images that you are sure you will treasure,” Martin says.
A pro photographer will take images that reflect a more intimate day. “You’ll have time for more special moments with your close loved ones, and that will be reflected in the photos,” says Hefner.
Don’t Forget Entertainment
With fewer guests, you can really invest in an amazing experience for those that are attending, says Babinski. “You may choose to have an upgraded dinner experience or provide entertainment that you wouldn't normally be able to afford with a larger guest count,” she says.
If you don’t have a band or DJ to keep guests entertained, you can have dancers or comedians, suggests Simone Vega, New York wedding planner and design specialist.
The Bottom Line
No matter the size of the wedding, the intention and authenticity behind why you and your partner want to get married should always be at the forefront of planning.
“Every decision made — from the vendor team to location — should reflect not only your own personalities but also the dynamic relationship as a whole,” says Frye. “I always tell my clients I want their event to feel like an extension of their everyday life, just jazzed up a bit!”
Appreciate the Laid-back Vibe
Inevitably, having a micro wedding is a more laid-back approach to tying the knot.
“It's more intimate, and we feel our couples are able to remember the small intricacies of the day,” says Vega. “You get to spend this wonderful and joyous occasion with your nearest and dearest surrounding you. You may not have to worry about family or friend drama as much — which definitely leads to a more stress-free day!”
The Bottom Line
Just remember: Whether you have 10 guests or 500, you have to comply with all legal requirements.
“If you’re having a friend officiate the ceremony, be sure to decide that early,” says Babinski. “We've seen too many cases of folks not having legal marriages because they didn't hire a pro or take the time to think about the ceremony. The ceremony is literally the reason for a wedding!”
You Can Get Things Done Quickly
Generally speaking, there’s a lot less waiting with micro weddings, says Alvarez.
“Because there is usually some sort of predetermined structure to them, either from the planner or venue you work with, they can be executed much faster which is ideal for couples who don't want to spend 12 to 18 months planning a wedding,” she explains.
The Bottom Line
“Couples on average spend 530 hours planning a larger, more extensive wedding day,” adds Vega. “You can cut that time in half by hosting a micro wedding!”
Keep a Close Eye on Your Budget
Although one of the biggest pros of a micro wedding is cost savings — “unless you're going really above and beyond in your planning, micro weddings are usually around $1,000 to 10,000,” says Babinski — you still have to monitor your outgoings carefully.
If you don’t, it can easily get out of hand.
The Bottom Line
It’s not just the venue that might charge a flat rate, regardless of the number of guests.
“Your photographer and videographer will still have the same rate, and even your hair and makeup will cost the same,” warns Campbell.
Read Your Contracts Carefully
In these pandemic times, even a micro wedding could be affected by changes with government-imposed restrictions.
“Make sure you read all your vendor contracts' cancellation and postponement clauses carefully, and be flexible should your plans need to change,” warns Choy.
The Bottom Line
It’s always wise to have a “rain date” in mind, says Vega — not so much if it rains but if plans have to be canceled due to things shutting down or someone getting sick.
“Nowadays, it's important to have a backup plan for everything involving your wedding,” she says. “Be sure to read through your vendor contracts and know exactly what their stipulations are if you have to reschedule your micro wedding.”
Adhere to All Safety Regulations
If you're having a micro wedding during pandemic times, it’s crucial that you know how to set up the ceremony and guest seating safely so everyone feels comfortable throughout the occasion, advises Vega.
“You also want to be sure that you can set up your decor beautifully despite the spacing issues or COVID-19 restrictions.”
The Bottom Line
Just because you have a smaller guest list, however, doesn’t mean that you can’t invite people to join virtually.
Roberts suggests adding a live stream option, like LoveStream, to include those you love in important moments like the ceremony.
It’s Still Your Day
If you’ve already bought a big, dramatic wedding gown for your original grand venue, don’t stress.
Just because you’re downsizing, it doesn’t mean you can’t still bring the drama or the glamor.
The Bottom Line
A micro wedding may be more relaxed due to the smaller numbers, but it’s still your day — so do it your way.
You can even have fun with the new regulations by including personalized hand-sanitizer bottles, custom printed masks in full color for all guests (including the motifs and patterns of your wedding decor), elegant disposable napkins and chic plastic cups, to ensure guests feel special and safe.
Have Realistic Expectations
Although you can have an incredible micro wedding, it’s also important to rethink what your big day will be like if you had originally planned something much bigger.
“If a couple is envisioning a rager of a party for their reception, a micro wedding likely won't give the same experience as a larger wedding,” says Alvarez. “Micro weddings can definitely still be fun, but it's obviously going to feel different in terms of the energy at the party.”
The Bottom Line
If you’re having a micro wedding but still feel as if you’re missing out on your “dream” day, that’s perfectly normal. “Micro weddings can also just not be the dream day for many brides,” says Roberts. “They imagined large groups on the dance floor, or saying ‘I do,’ in front of infinite crowds, and this isn't the same experience.”
That means you could have the best of both worlds. If you don’t want to postpone your nuptials, you can still have a bigger celebration of your marriage when COVID-19 restrictions are eased or lifted.