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Thanksgiving Jokes for the Ultimate Pranks-Giving

By

Brittany Alexandra Sulc

, updated on

October 17, 2024

There’s no greater annual feast than Thanksgiving — creamy mashed potatoes, green beans, cranberry sauce and, of course, turkey. But this year, you can also serve up some laughs! 

From sweet to corny to creamed, these Thanksgiving jokes will remind your loved ones who the biggest turkey really is.

Why did the turkey cross the road twice?

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To prove he wasn’t a chicken.

What role do green beans play in Thanksgiving dinner?

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The Casse-Role.

Where do you find a turkey with no legs?

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Exactly where you left it.

Why did a farmer run a steamroller over his potato field on Thanksgiving Day?

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Because he wanted to raise mashed potatoes.

What did the turkey say to the computer?

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Google, Google, Google.

Who isn’t hungry at Thanksgiving?

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The turkey because he's already stuffed.

Where do turkeys go to dance?

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The Butter Ball.

Why was the turkey arrested?

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Because the police suspected fowl play.

Why did the turkey choose to play the drums?

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Because he already had the drumsticks.

Why did the Thanksgiving stew cost so much?

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It had 18 carrots.

What did the turkey sing during her Miley Cyrus phase?

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I came in like a Butter Ball!

If a large turkey is a Gobbler, then what is a small one called?

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A Goblet.

If your great-grandmother saw you making mashed potatoes from a box…

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She’d roll over in her gravy.

What kind of music did the Pilgrims listen to?

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Plymouth rock.

What happens when a turkey mixes with a ghost?

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A poultry-geist.

Why did the cranberries turn bright red?

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Because they saw the turkey dressing.

Looking for the perfect turkey, a woman asked the supermarket employee if the turkeys got any bigger.

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A woman asked the supermarket employee if the turkeys got any bigger. 

The employee answered, "No, mam, they're dead."

What's covered in feathers and blue?

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A turkey holding its breath.

Why can't turkeys attend church?

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Because they use fowl language.

What should you wear on Thanksgiving?

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A har-vest.

What is Dracula's favorite holiday?

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Fangs-giving.

Why wasn't the Thanksgiving turkey seasoned?

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The cook had no thyme!

What's the Thanksgiving traditional dance called?

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The Turkey Trot.

What sound does a limping turkey make?

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Wobble, wobble.

What kind of key can't unlock doors?

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A tur-key.

What's with the pilgrim's bread?

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They did a crumb-y job.

When April showers bring May flowers, what do the May flowers bring?

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Pilgrims.

My family asked me to stop the Thanksgiving jokes…

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But I told them I couldn't quit cold turkey.

What do you call a turkey the day after Thanksgiving?

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Lucky.

What decimal do you get when you divide the circumference of a pumpkin by its diameter?

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Pumpkin pi.

Thanksgiving…

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The only holiday where we eat the mascot. 

I only have pies for you.

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(That’s the joke.)

What did the turkey declare to the hunter?

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Liberty, equality and bad aim for all.

What do you get when you mix an octopus with a turkey?

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Plenty of drumsticks for Thanksgiving.

Since the Pilgrims traveled on the Mayflower, how do college students travel?

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By way of scholar-ships!

Why did the pilgrims’ pants always fall down?

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Because their buckles were on their hats.

What did the turkey say as he entered the oven?

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Skip the small insults, and roast me!

Why was the turkey stopped by the police on the freeway?

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He was way over his feed limit.

What vegetables do you want for Thanksgiving dinner?

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Beets me!

What do you call a stuffed animal?

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You, after Thanksgiving dinner.

I accidentally sat on the sweet potatoes…

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 So, I guess we’ll have squash instead.

What is the difference between Election Day and Thanksgiving Day?

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On Thanksgiving, you only get a turkey for the day, but on Election day, you get a turkey for the next four years.

My favorite Thanksgiving dish is the pie…

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 But some people say it’s irrational.

What do you call a pilgrim’s age?

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A pilgrimage.

What did the teenager say to their parents after Thanksgiving dinner?

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I liked the leftovers before they were cool.

Why didn’t the pilgrims share secrets in the cornfields?

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Because the corn had ears.

When do you serve tofu turkey?

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Pranks-giving.

If fruit comes from a fruit tree, where do turkeys come from?

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A poul-tree.

Why do turkeys lay eggs?

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Because if they dropped them, they would break.

Knock, Knock! Who’s there?

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Arthur.

Arthur who?

Ar-thur any leftovers?

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