Found the One? These Hilarious Soulmate Quotes Tell It Like It Is
Around Valentine's Day, there are constant reminders about romance (or lack thereof). Finding your soulmate when there are literally billions of people out there is daunting.
We're not even sure soulmates exist, but on Feb. 14, they seem to be all over the place. Whether you've found your person, you're still searching or you've decided that staying single is more relaxing, these snarky soulmate quotes will balance out all the hearts and second-rate chocolate.
Maybe It's Time to Lower Your Standards
Soulmate quote: "Sorry your soulmate is completely out of your league." —Someecards
Bottom (love) line: Pretty sure your soulmate has to be on the same page to be the one, but we could be wrong.
That Explains Why We’re Still Single
Soulmate quote: "I'm pretty sure my soulmate will have a British accent." —Someecards
Bottom (love) line: We've been living on the wrong continent this entire time. Guess it's time to move to London!
Soulmate quote: "You can be my soulmate, minus the soul." —Someecards
Bottom (love) line: This is a telling soulmate quote. If you send this to your significant other and they don't leave you, it's real for sure.
Now, There's a Unique Compliment!
Soulmate quote: "You're my soulmate because you're the only person I never want to strangle." —Someecards
Bottom (love) line: If you don't want to strangle your partner at least once in awhile, are you even in a relationship? If you choose not to strangle them (or break up with them), then it's the real deal.
New One Every Day
Soulmate quote: "Happy to see you've found yet another 'soulmate.' They're like buses, aren't they?" —Someecards
Bottom (love) line: We'd say they're more like Pokemon. Gotta catch 'em all.
Online Dating Is Weird
Soulmate quote: "I accidentally swiped left, and now my soulmate is gone. Forever." —Someecards
Bottom (love) line: Does no one else find it odd to swipe through human beings like they're Instagram ads for shoes? The return policy on relationships is considerably more complicated.
Yeah, That’s What We Said. Soulmate.
Soulmate quote: "You are my soulmate, and by 'soulmate' I mean the person who knows to microwave a TV dinner just the way I like it." —Someecards
Bottom (love) line: Shining armor sounds heavy. You probably have to clean it with those pricy stainless steel wipes, too. The perfect microwavable mac 'n' cheese is more attainable.
Why Do You Say That Like It’s a Bad Thing?
Soulmate quote: "They say there's a soulmate out there for everyone. I'm worried mine's going to be a cat." —Someecards
Bottom (love) line: That would be evidence that cats have souls. If heaven is a thing, we'll get to be reunited with our childhood pets one day. Also, our soulmate could be fluffy. We see no problem with that.
This Soulmate Quote Knows What's Up
Soulmate quote: "You know you've found your soulmate when you talk about things you shouldn't even say out loud." —Someecards
Bottom (love) line: If you can share all your most intrusive thoughts out loud without them judging you, you've got a keeper.
The Price We Pay for Being Perfect Is High
Soulmate quote: "Why am I too awesome to have a soulmate?" —Someecards
Bottom (love) line: Heaves sigh. It's tough being the best.
Tag Your Bestie
Soulmate quote: "Finally found my soulmate– The one who completely understands & accepts me as I am. Unfortunately, she's a woman too & we're not lesbians." —Someecards
Bottom (love) line: Does anyone else have a pact to get pretend married to your best friend and move in together if you're still single at 50? Because it sounds more fun than sad.
And They Say Romance Is Dead
Soulmate quote: "Congratulations on meeting your soulmate while using an app on the toilet." —Someecards
Bottom (love) line: When your therapist said to trust your gut, they didn't mean it literally.
But What Does It Taste Like?
Soulmate quote: "Soulmate sounds like something Satan puts in his coffee." —Someecards
Bottom (love) line: Hellishly good, probably. How many souls do you think we have to drink to find one without a fear of commitment?
That’s One Possible Conclusion
Soulmate quote: "Everyone's over here like 'so-and-so is my soulmate!' And I'm over here like ... 'Damn, I must not have a soul.'" —Someecards
Bottom (love) line: Maybe they're lost. Or introverted. Finding a soulmate among 7 billion people seems stressful.
Oh, Because Getting Set Up by Your Grandma Was So Much Better?
Soulmate quote: "I'm certain I'll find my soulmate in the questionable and seedy world of online dating." —Someecards
Bottom (love) line: Say what you want about online dating, but the old version wasn't so great either. Your options were running into someone cute at the library, going on a blind date set up by your friends or giving speed dating a try. At least on Bumble, you can weed out the creeps from the comfort of your couch.
Soulmate quote: "Most people only find their soulmate once. Congratulations on finding your soulmate again for the fifth time." —Someecards
Bottom (love) line: Your mother must be so proud. Do all of your soulmates call her mom, or is that reserved for the one that lasts? When you find them, that is.
Soulmate quote: "If you're sad about being alone on Valentine's day, just remember, nobody loves you on every other day of the year either." —Someecards
Bottom (love) line: This soulmate quote isn't wrong, but did they have to be so honest? Honesty is the best policy, but we could use a white lie right about now.
We’re So Compatible
Soulmate quote: "I've been single for awhile, and I have to say, it's going very well. Like ... it's working out. I think I'm the one." —Someecards
Bottom (love) line: It's crazy. We finish each other's sentences all the time.
This Soulmate Quote Applies to Best Friends, Too
Soulmate quote: "I love how we can look at each other and, without saying anything, know we're making fun of the same person." —Someecards
Bottom (love) line: Snark needs no words when you keep the right company.
Soulmate quote: "I complete me." —Someecards
Bottom (love) line: Some soulmate quotes can be as funny or as deep as you want them to be. Interpret this one as you will.
Ah, Yes. Marriage.
Soulmate quote: "Today we celebrate our codependence." —Someecards
Bottom (love) line: What could be more beautiful than a commitment to making bad decisions together for the rest of your lives?
Is There a Rule That Soulmates Have to Be Human?
Soulmate quote: "Everybody has a girlfriend and boyfriend, and I'm just over here like 'I love food.'" —Someecards
Bottom (love) line: Our deep connection to ramen feels pretty supernatural. Does that count?
Now, That’s Real Love
Soulmate quote: "I love you enough to make our iPhone-Samsung relationship work." —Someecards
Bottom (love) line: The compatibility level here is debatable, but the amount of commitment required to overcome such divisiveness is the stuff of destiny.
Soulmate quote: "I want to make bad decisions with you forever." —Someecards
Bottom (love) line: Send it to your soulmate; then immediately adopt a third puppy together.
What a Cute Couple
Soulmate quote: "If Tinder really did work, then I'd be matched with burritos right now." —Someecards
Bottom (love) line: Traditional marriage vows describe a wedding as two souls uniting to become one. I guess that makes our last trip to Chipotle a spiritual experience.
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